Parents divorced at age 3. I spent weekends with my father in mobile Alabama from age 3-11 when he passed away from aids. My mom remarried when I was 12. I overdosed at age 11 from father's death. Was molested twice as a child (won’t mention by who) I started drinking and smoking pot at age 12 and having sex at age 13. We moved to Augusta GA my 9th grade year and lived there until after my 11th grade year. I smoked weed, drank and did mushrooms and microdots (acid) all during 9th-11th grade. Was also very promiscuous and raped in 10th grade by an older boy in school (no one believed me). My senior year we moved to Florida. It all got worse. Began snorting cocaine this year. My stepbrother killed himself this year. My mom and stepdad divorced, and I moved with her to her hometown of Oxford MS.
From age 18-34 I went from cocaine, to smoking crack, prostituting for crack, being trafficked from house to house for money and dope, I did ecstasy frequently, smoked weed, was with lots of men and women, drank daily, in and out of treatment centers, prison 5 times, seduced and taken advantage of by a preacher and several officers of the law, used heroine, needles, meth, was traded by men and boyfriends to the drug dealers for their drugs, broke my neck in a car wreck (should be dead or paralyzed) gave my son to his aunt because I didn’t want him around me (while I was doing drugs) in 2007 when he was 1 and I was 26. There is so much more. I went all over the world to concerts and would end up with people I don’t know in different states. Had a daughter in 2015, my wreck was February 2016 and my mom died in April 2016 of cancer. I had a one-year-old with a broken neck and a meth addiction and I was all alone. I knew God hated me.
Meth was the darkest hell on earth there is. I have seen demons and hell and I couldn’t stop putting the meth in my veins and I was so scared. The stories of what I saw would keep you up at night.
I hit my bottom. Jesus met me in my bedroom, and I was all alone and in March of 2017 I found a yearlong faith-based program and I am FREE today.
I have both of my children back.
I have been married over 3 years to the hardest working, loving, selfless and caring men I know. I work at the home for addiction I went to. I work at my church. I work at a Garden for sex trafficked women. I go all over MS and speak and do jail ministry. I am all about Jesus and His people and serving Him to the best of my ability and teaching my children to do the same.
I love Gods word and the Holy Spirit.
I’m a bit of a fanatic.
My Faith Was Tested
Arianna Lexus is an award-winning SAG actress and producer, who has been working full-time professionally since 2014. She has always had the desire to perform and started displaying her passion at a young age through theatre. After receiving a full scholarship for the performing arts, Arianna took a break from pursuing her dream of performing to raise her newborn son, Matthew, instead choosing to work as a Licensed Massage Therapist for ten years and coordinating international education at a children's hospital.
It was in 2014 that she had a dream telling her to quit her job and pursue her acting career once again. In her mind, it was now or never. Some may call that cliche or crazy, but she called it fate and knew that was God guiding her down the right path. Everyone thought she was crazy and making a huge mistake, chasing some pipe dream that could never become a reality, but she knew they were wrong and followed her heart. It was extremely difficult, considering the lack of support she had from family and close friends, yet fortunately for her, there were a few close people that truly believed in her and her talents, including her boss at the hospital, who became like a father figure to her and insisted she do this!
This road she chose to follow hasn’t been easy, it was filled with blood, sweat, tears, challenges and endless disappointment, yet she knew if she kept with it, one day it would be worth it. In 2021, after several years of fighting and clawing her way through stereotypical roles and/or a lack of substance in the roles offered to her, Arianna finally got her big break with the lead role in Matthew Cichella’s “God’s Not Here”, which is the first faith-based anthology film ever created. Life had seemingly finally turned around for Arianna, finding a home in faith-based films, but what came never she could have never expected.
While riding high off of successfully wrapping “God’s Not Here” and despite being in the best shape of her life (including doing some hardcore stunt training) and being fully vaccinated, Arianna and her entire family were diagnosed with Covid-19 in December 2021. After 20 days of being sick at home, her family finally got better but Arianna, unfortunately, found herself getting worse and worse until one morning she woke up unable to walk and was experiencing the most horrific pain she ever felt. Covid-19 had attacked her body, blood and bones causing her to be hospitalized for the next four months, seeing more than 100 doctors and specialists, amongst 13 different hospitals, all while getting zero answers as to how to defeat this deadly virus.
While battling the life-threatening symptoms caused by the disease, including swelling in her organs, red fire rashes that burned her body, loss of consciousness at times, among endless other complications, Arianna began to question her once strong faith. She had always been a believer but in this dire time of need, she couldn't understand why God would do this to her. Why would He allow her to suffer so badly for such an extended period of time, in front of her only child? She cried out to God, begging Him to just take her and release her from this pain.
At one point, when the pain had become unbearable, she thought about taking her own life. Her family was frantic and scrambling to find answers. Her mom began reaching out to prayer groups and healers all across the world. The truth was no doctor was going to be able to heal her. She knew her only chance was to give it to God and put her trust in faith and believe God would provide!
It was once Arianna finally let go and chose God, renewing her once strong faith, that a miracle happened! A healer her mother located called Arianna on the phone and offered to pray with her. During this prayer, Arianna could feel the Holy Spirit saving her. She began crying healing tears and knew that no matter what happened going forward, she was going to be okay. Arianna had prayer warriors from all over the world praying for her and the magnitude the power of prayer has is just so profound!
Arianna was sent to rehab the next day, arriving in a wheelchair, unable to walk on her own. Within nine days of arriving, Arianna was kickboxing, swimming, doing yoga and running obstacle courses. The staff at the rehab facility were at a loss for words, describing it only as a true miracle! She went home and stopped taking all 13 medications she was previously told she would be on for the rest of her life. She began a routine of taking vitamins, eating healthy, and learning to heal from the trauma she had experienced. Not only could Arianna walk again but she began stunt training as if nothing happened, despite having AVN from Covid-19 in both knees and her right foot! Unfortunately, the shift in happiness was short lived as in May 2021 only 2 months after coming home from the hospital her mother attempted suicide and was hospitalized, almost losing her life as well. Life was once again testing Arianna. She knew that making faith-based films would make her a target of evil forces, as the darkness was again trying to stop her from helping to spread the word in beautiful faith-based films about God, faith, love, loss, hope and forgiveness. Despite the extreme trauma that was for her debilitating at times, Arianna once again, with God on her side and a strong believe in faith, fought back.
With her mother slowly recovering and Arianna’s own health on the mend, she once again decided to overcome the odds and fight for her dream, this time going on to film and produce the sequel to “God’s Not Here,” called “God’s Not Here 2: A Testament of Faith.” But not being one to let the darkness win, she immediately followed that film up by acting in and producing the the psychological thriller, “Hyde Out”. Aside from all the trauma Arianna was already facing in her life she found herself being abused and mistreated by some very disrespectful men on this specific set where she was already in such a fragile state mentally, emotionally and psychologically due to the nature of that role and how her trauma personally related to those events. Instead of caving under the extreme pressure and circumstances Arianna not only took the abuse she did so with a smile on her face continuing to be kind to the men who wronged her and somehow gathered the energy and motivation to complete that film. With only being out of rehab less than six months and still mentally overcoming all she had recently endured; Arianna was able to fight off the darkness and complete two feature films.
To this day, Arianna continues to use her platform as an actor and producer to spread positivity into a world that so desperately needs it. Whether it be spreading the message of hope and faith in the “God’s Not Here” series or raising awareness for victims of domestic abuse and violence as well as suicide prevention in “Hyde Out,” or being a voice for women in the industry fighting for equality and an end to the discrimination and abuse women face so that they can feel safe to be creative and do their jobs! Arianna is on a mission to help and inspire as many people as she can.
With all she has had to overcome and with everything that she has been able to accomplish, despite all the trauma she has endured, Arianna knows that anything is possible if you believe and have faith! They say our test is our testimony and Arianna plans on using her story to help inspire others overcome their trials and tribulations in life!!
I am reminded of an old song that says, “As I look back over my life, and when I think things over, I can truly say that I’ve been blessed, I’ve got a testimony.” It all begins after birth…I was actually taken away from my birth mother which caused me to become a ward of the state. This was due to my biological mother’s mental instability. I was then placed in foster homes until finally, I was adopted at the age of one. My father(adopted), having only a third-grade education was a contractor with the responsibility of mixing the mortar as houses were being built. My mother(adopted) who had only a sixth-grade education was a homemaker and babysitter charging only 2.00 per day!
The downward spiral began when my adopted father was faced with chronic illnesses which made it very difficult for him to work. This caused a financial hardship, causing me to grow up in extreme poverty ending in welfare. Many times, there was no running water, food or heat in our dilapidated "shack looking" house. This house was infested with roaches, mice and snakes.
As if that wasn’t enough, I was sexually abused by five different men, including my father. During one episode of violation, he (my father) justified the act by stating, “It’s ok, you’re really not my daughter anyway…you’re adopted.” In that 600 square foot home, I was being sexually abused time after time which caused me to have a fear of men. Because of the trauma, my academic performance in school was affected. I was then labeled as having a learning disability. From there, because of all of the pressure, by my senior year in high school, I had a nervous breakdown and ended up in a mental institution.
While there, I had no one to turn to expect the Lord Jesus Christ. Though others had let me down, I knew that this one wouldn’t. I pressed into Him like never before and getting to know him as my best friend more and more!
During my senior year graduation, I stood around as my peers talked about where they were going to college. That was something that was never talked about in my house. I had hoped the question would not be asked to me as to where I was accepted to college. Of course, the inevitable happened…it was my turn to answer. Because I did not want to stand out, I lied, (which I am not proud of) and made up something. I had no idea what I was saying when I told my peers that I was going to work for a year, and then would go to college. After graduation, I went back home, knelt down by my bed and said to the Lord, “God I want to go to college like the rest of my friends. Can I go? If I don’t go, maybe you have something better for me.” After I prayed, I left it there with Jesus, and continued on with my life. Did I go to college the year I graduated? No, I worked in a daycare center for a year.
My mother and I were a part of a local church. Because we did not own a vehicle, a deacon picked us up and gave us a ride to the church. As we sat in the pew, an usher came up to me and handed me a college application and said, “Renay, the pastor wants you to fill this out.” I had no idea why he was giving this to me, but I took it out of respect. There was a brand-new pastor at this church whom I did not know very well at all. I told NO ONE of my desire to go to college except the Lord. As the pastor exhorted the congregation, he said these words…”Good morning congregation, the Lord has given me a vision of a young lady in our congregation who desires to go to college but cannot afford to." He then pointed his finger at me and asked me to stand. He told me the Lord had given him this vision about me, and they would pay for my tuition, books, room and board and give me extra spending money. Though I had not seen a college application before, I took it home and filled it out the best I could. I held it up to the Lord and said, “God, it’s in your hands now.” Some weeks went by, and I received my acceptance letter! I went to college and did very well. I graduated with honors and became a teacher.
After going to college, I started understanding who I was in Christ. I believed that the same Lord who offered me salvation was able not only to take me out of those horrible circumstances, but He was fully able to complete my deliverance. But this was in fact a decision that “I” had to make. Like Jesus asked the man at the pool of Bethesda who had his infirmity 38 years, would you like to get well? 18 years was long enough for me, and I desperately wanted to be made whole. Once I made the commitment to healing, I knew what I had to do. The first thing that I had to do was to completely forgive and release my offenders. This actually released me from them and the power that their offense had on my life. From that point forward, I was able to bind myself to the Lord and allow Him to make me whole. God was undoing what the canker worm had eaten. As long as I made “Him” my delight, He would daily fill the voids. I learned how to worship the Lord because He was not a convenience, but a necessity. He was and is not only my savior in every sense of the word, but my Lord.
Today, I am FREE, HEALED, SAVED and DELIVERED!!!! If the devil had only known, he would have left me alone!! I am an ordained minister and LOVE sharing the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I am happily married (28 years) with two beautiful children. I went from a place of not enough to more than enough! I give God thanks!
Many of the afflictions of the righteous, but the LORD delivereth him out of them all.
By the age of 20, I had spent the last eight years of my life in a down spiral of self-destructive behavior, dangerous social circles, and abusive relationships and I was at the end of myself and desperate for change. I was so desperate that one day I dropped down to my knees and lifted up a heartfelt prayer to whoever would listen. I said,” God if you are real, show me who you are, and I will commit the rest of my life to you.” I began to name all the concepts of God I had from various religions and pledged my life to follow whoever He revealed himself as.
There wasn’t an immediate change after that prayer, but heart became more open and receptive and even drawn to Christian music and television. As I would watch and listen, I would eventually begin to also pray with the preachers when they would invite people to give their lives to Christ and I would sing along with the songs.
In the Spring of 2000. I finally had my moment of absolute clarity that I needed to not only believe and be inspired by what I was hearing but fully commit to it but surrendering my life to God in response to the teachings of Christ. Looking back, I know now it’s that was the moment I was truly empowered, and my life began to change.
Just a few weeks after that, I made my way into a local storefront church in the year 2000 where I began to receive Biblical teaching and pastoral care helping me to begin to understand more about Jesus and the Bible and what was taking place on the inside of me. Eventually, I came to understand that when I had surrendered my life to God in response to the teachings of Jesus Christ, I had experienced a rebirth. A new Sarah Grace began to emerge and what followed was supernatural and remarkable.
Now over twenty-two years later, I am a licensed and ordained member of Christian Clergy, a church and conference speaker, a self-published author, a television host and producer, and a coach and creative offering a diversity of professional creative services including consulting, graphic and web design, author coaching, and more.
I knew that it wasn’t a proper response to keep this experience to myself, but I needed to share it with everyone I can, and I have spent many years trying to perfect how to share my radical testimony of both salvation and transformation and share how others can embrace this experience for themselves!
Goldie lived with her Jewish family on the grounds of a mental health institute where her father was head psychiatrist. He was well-respected and deeply loved by the staff and the patients, but he was physically and emotionally abusive to Goldie and her sister. Goldie escaped to college and lived a double life: sex and drugs in a hippie lifestyle in a commune, and a “good girl” lifestyle with her family. An abortion spiraled her into depression, flashbacks, promiscuity, and heavier drugs. She always had “brain fog” but now blocked out all details of the abortion. Although petrified of her father, in her desperation, she told him about the abortion. Initially angry, he arranged for counseling, which led to her first steps in breaking free from the powerful hold he had on her.
Goldie and her boyfriend Dave were performing with a traveling honky tonk group when Goldie had an affair. Invited to a prayer meeting, Goldie and Dave met the Lord. As they accepted Yeshua (Jesus) as their Savior, Goldie was given the supernatural gift of joy. Soon after, they married; Goldie confessed the affair and Dave forgave her. This Jewish woman’s commitment to Yeshua as her Savior, and her commitment to a non-Jewish man as her husband, were critical further steps of breaking free from her father’s stranglehold. Ten years later, her father received Yeshua as his Savior on his deathbed. But Goldie had no idea that her father’s hold upon her would continue past the grave.
Dave did not want to have children because of his dysfunctional childhood. Goldie fell into a dark time of depression until she wrestled her way to the very painful surrender of not having children. God restored His gift of joy and positioned her in a crisis pregnancy center, to serve women considering abortion. She was required to attend a post-abortion Bible study, where the memories that had been suppressed for 27 years came crashing back into her soul. She could hear the words of the nurse as her dead baby hit the bedpan, “You would have had a perfect baby boy.” Through this Bible study, God enabled her to receive His forgiveness and to forgive herself. In this new position, God made her a “mother of many.”
The Lord was laying the groundwork for one final surrender: the hold that her father still had on her life. Goldie had no idea that her brain fog was connected to the pain of her past. One sunny day, she was heading to the beach and suddenly it began to rain. The Lord spoke to her heart: “Surrender now!” Right there in the car, with the rain pouring down, a prayer of surrender welled up from within her, and she totally surrendered her painful past and any hold her father had on her life. The moment she stopped praying, the rain ceased, and the sun burst forth—and the brain fog totally lifted! She knew at that moment the Lord had totally healed her brain and set her free!